The Monster

Everyone who reads this blog knows it is about achieving balance in life. Whether it is food, experiences, art, music, stuff, people or feelings, I feel like I need to control it all and keep it balanced.

I wanted to blog about something very real and difficult that I call “the monster”. I have to factor “the monster” coming and going in and out of my day as I try to achieve this balance. “The monster” is the feeling I get when a hormonal wave comes over me. I don’t feel overly sad or overly angry. I would call it a cousin or relative to the emotions: anxious and uneasiness. Some people would say its a type of PMS. Some would say it’s when you cry but don’t know why.

If “the monster” comes over you, especially after your body has just gone through a pregnancy, you are not alone; I am at least one other woman who experiences this.

I usually notice that it will take some kind of trigger to bring it on, it can be as small as spilling a glass of water on the floor or something not going as planned. It feels like a pit in my stomach and sometimes it takes triple the effort to take a deep breath.

Crocheting or reading help. A few tears shed sometimes help. Time and patience help it to go away as well. I beg my husband not to ignore me but to ignore “the monster”.

I want my readers to be reminded that bloggers of happy and inspiring things are also people who have struggles and challenges. I usually share to inspire but today I share to help someone feel less lonely when their monster comes.

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